Posts by Van Gogh

36

Can you believe it? I've been here four years already.

by jgnat in

jw
friends

it seems like such a short while ago i came on here, the unashamed wife of a jw, looking for information.

looking for support.

you all gave it and more.

I'd love to hear from anyone who grew up in the truth and is gay

by PaulMarshall in

hi.. i have decided to join this site and hopefully connect with some people who will know what my story has been.

i guess it is best to read my profile, but the upshot of this new found technology is that i am no longer alone in my isolation.

i can hopefully reach out and connect with people who really understand what it is like in my head!

Van Gogh

Welcome Paul,

On the basis of what I've read I'll connect with you - even without being gay.....

VG

112

Do you see your self remarrying?

by Cabin in the woods in

jw
friends

.

given your past life experiences and your current enlightenment would you ever get into that level of commitment again?.

cab

Do you see your self remarrying?

by Cabin in the woods in

jw
friends

.

given your past life experiences and your current enlightenment would you ever get into that level of commitment again?.

cab

Robdar,
:“Van Gogh is my favorite artist. When in Amsterdam, I have sometimes waited in line a couple of hours just to get into the museum--it is so worth it. Are you an artist also?”
No, though I have dabbled somewhat in attempting the application of paint to canvas. Van Gogh is one of my favorite painters also, just like many in the rich cultural heritage of a country currently facing an identity crisis.
When you are in Ams next time, don’t forget to let me buy you a drink.
VG

112

Do you see your self remarrying?

by Cabin in the woods in

jw
friends

.

given your past life experiences and your current enlightenment would you ever get into that level of commitment again?.

cab

Van Gogh

unbeliever:
Perhaps deep trust can take on another meaning beyond the age of 25; beyond having “deeply trusted” a couple of times already. You might have noticed that this issue comes into play when people have been disappointed once too often; at an age when we might feel left behind, alone, without the advantage of age or external beauty to ever remedy the way we envisaged it.
Deep trust then takes on the meaning of lasting commitment. True love never just falls out of the sky. This kind of commitment could not be ownership.
VG

112

Do you see your self remarrying?

by Cabin in the woods in

jw
friends

.

given your past life experiences and your current enlightenment would you ever get into that level of commitment again?.

cab

Van Gogh

(((purps))):
” That knowing each other has added to our lives, we are great friends and the companionship expands out lives. At the end of a lousy day, a wonderful day, we can lay down together and sleep knowing that what is most precious is with us.”
That is the valuable lesson IMO. (edited to say: most movies aren't made about this post-romantic stage; perhaps we should watch less movies and move on in real life)
(((peg))):
You not alone as far as your circumstances are concerned. Please take heart; aarque’s experience shows that there are lot’s out there in the same position – who shy back – but who have learnt the essence of caring and loving. That’s the upside of the progressed state as far as age and experience is concerned. It is a matter of seeking such ones out.
VG

112

Do you see your self remarrying?

by Cabin in the woods in

jw
friends

.

given your past life experiences and your current enlightenment would you ever get into that level of commitment again?.

cab

Van Gogh

Serendipity:
We all do, even if ignorant of that realization.

Khufu and Dansk:
Come on now guys - give her a break. Besides, I'm a self-professed mortal - I don't qualify.
(though we could invoke her intercession on match-making matters...)
VG

112

Do you see your self remarrying?

by Cabin in the woods in

jw
friends

.

given your past life experiences and your current enlightenment would you ever get into that level of commitment again?.

cab

Van Gogh

Dansk the matchmaker

Looking forward to meeting you in WSM next week!!

VG

edited to say: Mouthy.......

112

Do you see your self remarrying?

by Cabin in the woods in

jw
friends

.

given your past life experiences and your current enlightenment would you ever get into that level of commitment again?.

cab

Van Gogh

Calliope,

I did not describe a successful marriage (or long-term relationship based on expresses intentions, for that matter). Only what I believe one should be prepared to invest in order to achieve such a possible result. Of course a long-term commitment or (marital) relationship, like anything in life, is a risk, and could be worth only the paper it’s printed on. My words are only theory and intentions.

Serving out a marriage-term merely on the basis of a one-time contractual agreement would be a sorry state indeed. There are no guarantees (paper certainly isn’t) and there is no ideal marriage or relationship. But I do believe some sort of a commitment has at least to be made – to the other person. Committing to a marriage proposal is only a start and, yes, perhaps not that important except for the outside trappings. But do we want to commit to keep on committing?

It often takes many mistakes and failures in order to get this far. You’d need to have some level of confidence for the other party to think likewise. It’s the price we pay for having the freedom not to be trapped in a life-long loveless marriage based on a simple piece of paper with a stamp and a couple signatures.

Sorry for the rational rambling – empty words in themselves, I know.

BTW, you live in the Netherlands?

VG

112

Do you see your self remarrying?

by Cabin in the woods in

jw
friends

.

given your past life experiences and your current enlightenment would you ever get into that level of commitment again?.

cab

Van Gogh

Having grown up as dub, I have been a bit of a loner all my life. I was proud of my independence. Now, I believe this to be an unrewarding easy way out as well.

Since leaving the dubs six months ago my perspective on life past, present and future has of course changed radically. Within the confines of the bOrg there seemed to be few options but to remain alone. This could somehow be justified.

My non-jdub wife left me when I went back to practicing within the confines of the concept I was still a captive of back then. I believe that through sheer ignor/arrog-ance I was personally responsible to a large extent for her departure. I have been alone for more then ten years now – what a waste.

I now realize I only live once, and life is short. I have learnt many lessons the hard way. Now that I would perhaps be free to do as I please, I find that I am totally uninterested in exploring casual relationships. Accepting my mortality and losing my jdub morality, I found myself left with next to nothing, having to reevaluate and reestablish what life should be about for me – completely on my own this time. I have decided that no matter what, in the end all that counts is love and people. This is what bears fruit, makes beautiful things happen and thrive – regardless of any beliefs. Only on the outside of the org have I finally and fully recognized the possible implications and meaning of the concept of love and acceptance – without judgment.

I’m sick of being alone. The rest of my life, hopefully the next 25/30 years or so, I want to share and grow old with someone. No situation is ideal, but I crave for taking my responsibility in accepting, caring, loving, cherishing and devoting myself to/for someone willing to accept me as I am. I try to no longer look in the wrong places and at external attraction. I want to make somebody happy and be happy for it. I’m with anewme, Rabbit and Robdar

VG